I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
