Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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