On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Cover your peen. We're going out.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
