I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Let's paint friendship bongs
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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