Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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