My balls are so social today.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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