I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
