marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize