I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize