i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize