Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
