And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
