So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
