we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
we're making bets on your personal life
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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