i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
