Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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