He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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