i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
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