they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
