Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I have feelings that need drinking.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
