I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Randomize
