dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize