Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
