in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize