Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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