the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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