You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
