Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
