Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
