we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
