she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
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My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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