It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
