Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize