Sry I called you an 8
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
