dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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