butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
