shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
