Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
is that a dick in a sweater?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize