Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
