im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
In America we eat man semen.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Randomize
