Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
