I think I just saw someone hide a body.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
