i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm like, not good at living.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
