apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize