you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
