my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
