what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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