I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
