Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
We have started to decorate penises.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
