I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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